W2. Joy of the Highest Good

There’s joy in the everyday sense as we know it, that bubbly feeling that rises from the inside to tell you everything’s not just okay, it’s great!

And then there’s stoic joy, a slightly harder concept to grasp.

From my understanding it can be summed up like this:

It’s about doing good, not feeling good.

A strange concept for sure.

We’re so used to putting our feelings first, sometimes wisely where we’ll make momentary sacrifices for long-term pleasure.

But the stoic notion of joy doesn’t regard the feelings as a measurement for success or failure at all, only virtuous actions.

In other words, you can live a perfectly good life without feeling good.

But there’s certainly more to it.

In a way, we’re training our minds to stop seeking emotional pleasure at the expense of doing good things.

And that’s something to be proud of.

That proudness is a pleasure in itself and is deeply fulfilling—but there are no guarantees it’ll happen.

Similarly, doing what’s good will often affect others positively and make them feel good, knowing this is often enough to feel good ourselves.

A simple everyday example:

My father in law is currently taking care of our car back in Sweden while me and my partner are in Cyprus.

This means there are some obligations on his part, he’s got to dedicate once a week to driving out and fetching the car, drive it around for awhile to keep the car and battery healthy, and then go back home.

There are no seemingly direct pleasures or rewards to be found in doing this–which makes me all the more impressed by him.

The odds are, he knows this is making us happy, and that might just be making him happy too knowing this.

In a way, it’s like using reasoning to understand the good thing, and that itself—along with its action—is often enough to make us feel fulfilled—sometimes even happy!

Understanding the Good

The freedom that understanding what’s good and not gives, it’s incredible!

I’ve always been a fitness junkie, and tend to optimize my dietary decisions in order to stay in shape.

What I’ve found isn’t that that’s not valuable—just given the context there are far more valuable things!

We currently have visitors from Sweden over (girlfriend’s brother and his partner) and as I always do, I pause or just limit my training schedule a lot and eat a free diet.

What’s different this time is the relationship and experience of it.

Normally I would just think that there’s some fitness damage and it’ll be recovered in a few weeks.

But now I’m feeling proud, happy and fulfilled.

I am able to put others and my social needs above my self-centered fitness needs.

The actual consequences of my behavior are the same but how I relate and experience it is different.

I now know and feel that I’m doing the right thing—taking care of them and opening up my own social limitations so everyone can enjoy themselves more.

It’s a practice of moderation (avoiding the extremes of a fitness lifestyle), justice (focusing on the social aspect of our nature and putting others’ vacation happiness above my training routines), and wisdom (recognizing all of it and putting it into practice).

Justice (focusing on the social aspect of our nature and putting others’ reduction happiness above my training routines) and wisdom (recognizing all of it and putting it into practice).

Premeditatio Malorum

So I’ve been using premeditatio malorum (meditation of adversities) where you basically spend some time trying to imagine what could go wrong during the day, and how to handle it wisely and virtuously.

So far it’s been a great tool and routine to have, not only do I feel prepared for the worst and often get to enjoy the best—but I also get some insights about things that needs to be done.

Surprisingly, I’ve also found myself having more moments of joy and happiness throughout the day.

The sense of preparedness and knowing good from bad makes for such a fulfilling life!

Change of Identity

What an amazing sense of freedom it is to know one’s highest good!

I continue to enjoy my time with our visitors and it’s increasingly clear that doing the virtuous thing—focusing on giving them the best possible experience—isn’t a sacrifice at all, it’s the most joyous thing because it’s the right thing to do.

It’s not a sudden change of behavior on my part, I’ve always been happy to do this.

The difference is that when my health and fitness are seen as preferred indifferents rather than the highest good, taking care of others like this becomes a no-brainer.

Instead, THAT is the highest good, because it’s the virtuous thing to do—and what a joy it is to know it!

There’s a progressive shift in identity going on.

The hobbies and passions of my life that tends to consume me and become my everything are all turning into tools in the “preferred indifferences” bag.

No longer are my own needs with emotional charges the highest bidder—there’s been an invasion of virtue who’s merciless but lovingly righteous—and how freeing it is!